Archive for the ‘technology’ Category

Twitter replacing my blogging…?

I don’t think I can shut this blog down. Though I know my readers have probably left me long ago. I just don’t have the focus for it now that I’m on Twitter. Is that pathetic? Who knows for how long this trend will last. But I’m micro-blogging everyday on my page @Jenice78. I have a lot to say and sometimes nothing at all. But in this world of get it now, short and sweet, blogging can become pretty difficult. How about you? Are you finding the same problem?

I will surely come back here again very soon and talk to you some more…if anyone is even left! But until then, you can read my ramblings on my Twitter page. And I still continue to update my photo blog at artsbyjphotography.com.

Who else is still out there, WordPress writers?

The iPhone guilt….

I finally purchased one and I feel dirty. I think it’s elitist and Apple is the super sophisticated and slick version of the monopolizing Wal-Mart. They have taken over. And they have infiltrated everything. Yet…I…can’t…stop…playing…with…the…koi…pond!

I have to admit, though a very reluctant buyer, I am enjoying this blasted thing. It’s a miniature extension of ourselves. All our cravings summed up in little applications. All our musical choices labeled and at our fingertips. Oh why, oh why have I succumbed to sheeple behavior?  Oh yea. Because it’s cool.

koi2

How to get anything done: Lie

I am a very upfront, and highly honest person. Maybe a bit too honest. I’ve said that before here at my blog but now I see that I have been wrong all along.

I recently spilled a glass of my breakfast Odwalla B-Monster smoothie all over my work laptop computer…and it wasn’t closed. At least the computer itself wasn’t effected but the keyboard no longer types the letters “U, Y, G, V and J.” I kind of need those letters. Well when I called IT, they basically told me in a very quaint and polite way.

“Just turn the laptop over in a towel. Everything will be OK. Contact your manager.”

Basically I needed to call my boss to see about replacing the whole thing as it was clear that the help desk didn’t offer an alternative other than make a hope, wish and a prayer.  I am quite sure that all I need is a new keyboard because luckily the actual computer works fine in my work docking station. I just can’t use it at home. When I told my boss, he was like “We’ll get it replaced.” But when I told him that I told the IT department that I spilt the smoothie he said, “You really are too honest, Jenice.” Is this a bad trait to have. Geez. I thought that was endearing in a person.

I guess some would call what I did too much disclosure. I probably should have just not told the whole story. But that just seems too unethical and of all the questionable things I am guilty of, being unethical is one thing I don’t want my name attached. So I told it like it was. I shall call it “Smoothie-gate.”

 

Well, all was fine for a while. The crud dried and the keys seemed to work for like 30 minutes and then it was no use. I was contacted this week about getting things sorted (not exactly sure how) but I just got this email from the tech handling my case.

 Just found out that the Dispatch was canceled for being honest about the reason for replacing the keyboard.

So when I emailed him back I said:

So if I had lied then I would have had this expedited better? Good to know that lying is the best policy these days. (INSERT SARCASTIC SMILEY FACE HERE.)

He said I had a point. However the the moral of the story is that when the B-Monster hit my keyboard, and I made the call, I should have said it just stopped working. I should have lied my ass off (or what many people call “not telling the whole truth/story”) and I would have a laptop with keys that work right now.  And as it turns out, the tech is going to find a way to help me so maybe being too honest still works out in the end. But really, lying is the best policy when it comes to getting things done.

Technology and the loss of innocence

Someone should figure out how to bottle innocence. Once in a tightly sealed and hopefully decorative container, it should reside behind a glass shelf that reads in all red cap letters: IN CASE OF EMERGENCY, BREAK GLASS. Driving to my parents’ house usually brings my mind to way too many thoughts. It’s not a very long drive, but long enough and passes through enough traffic to make the mind wander.

Usually when I reach the town they live in, I’ve already relived high school. This usually means I’ve made the mistake of listening to the older pop/rock stations and heard something that reminded me of that time or this time with so and so and what’s-their-face. It becomes even a more sad affair when I decide to make a detour to one of the millions of local Sonics for a quick slush. Why? Because I usually pass my old high school. Or go down a street I had driven years ago to get back home, only it had a few less churches and strip malls then. I just start thinking…

Today I started thinking about innocence. And what, like I mentioned, would happen if I could drink such sweet nectar as our lost innocence in case of an emergency. My emergency would be to erase how technology has made communication so damn impersonal. Even though as you would figure it, technology should make things easier — more communicative. Easier, yes. More communicative, no. I’ve lost relationships via email. Lost them over the Web. Destroyed them in text messages. What happened to communication? The good old fashioned kind? I would settle for two soup cans and string if that would get me to it better. What happens when we get so advanced we forget humanity? Break out the label-makers because yes, you can label this as very idealist and sappy. But can you answer this question? Have you even thought about it?

Not only that, things get misinterpreted all the time when they aren’t said. For example a recent text I got from a guy who is trying to get back in my life (not sure if I’m really into that idea anymore) said something about “no strings attached.” Upon closer reading I realized he meant that comment on his end not mine. He meant, “Just let me take you to dinner, no strings attached.” I had to re-read this because there was a misplaced comma but it might as well be passivity in language, lack of spell check…things just get lost. The same can be said when you are angry. Once you have sent that message it’s gone and more than likely you will not get a chance to explain yourself verbally, in person or with those soup cans.

We rely so much on things that aren’t breathing. Somewhere we lost our bottle of innocence. The essence of what is pure. Our youth. We have grown so old and above ourselves. We put the gospel on the words we read on little LCD screens, monitors — the underside of your flip phone. There is no second story or forgiveness once it’s all out there. There is no discussion. Well, there is this forum of communication — blogging. We use our blogs as an open dialog stream of consciousness where everyone can come in and have their say. We use our blog as a reciprocal place to meet wits. But even this wonderful vein of technology can only mimic the real thing. In the end there is just no comparison to the spoken word. It came first. It is the skeleton of it all. The point of it all. I only hope it doesn’t get buried in pixels, bytes and coding!

On August 20 I was a growing blog…

Ah. It’s like a nice and distant memory. Just happy to say it happend once!

So what’s the key to being a growing blog?

So far I’ve noticed that the more religion or controversy (but with a little tact) the better. Oh and it doesn’t hurt to throw in sex and technology. If you do all four at the same time, then you are a genius! Politics: no brainer. And if you mix it up with sex, definite win but gee with the way politics are, both are pretty much synonymous!

Splice in some Facebook talk and a dash of sports.

If you live in New York: bonus points. If you live in New York and write about it: guaranteed win. If you are someone trying to nip at the heels of worthless celebrity blogger, Perez Hilton, triple points. Especially if you mostly cover black celebrities.

If you are a crazed fan who is obsessed with a hottie from Prison Break, you are golden.

There you have it. I will keep adding to this list. Feel free to add to it as well. I’ll give you credit for it.

Here are some so far. There are also some ideas in the comments section…

“For Google juice use a nice long list of celebrities.
Today I used celebrities who have tried to commit suicide (via Mental_floss.)”
goinglikesixty

“Generally, the more people I annoy, the higher my technorati ranking.

Also, being an entomologist the week of a giant spider web occurred in Texas helped :)”Bug Girl

“Sex, celebrity and a damn good title.. It’s all in the titles.” — Paul Baylay

“It would also be good to be an atheist and throw in a little religion bashing (even better just focus on the Christians). Atheism is like the new craze or something like that.” — Bacony Goodness

Please put a stop to lip avatars…

ooh, so sexy — NOT!oh nooooz!please put a stop to this!ahhhhhhhhh!

Is anyone else sick of avatars represented by lips? Or is it just me?

I mean there are all kinds. Glossy ones. Ones on fire. Some with piercings. Tri-colors. Others with all kinds of chintzy clip art surrounding it. Many with special effects and bubbles. Lots with suggestive props…

It is a trend that has kept its viral appeal. Someone must put an end to them…for all that is truly right and just in this world. Maybe we need to start counteracting the lips with the recent feet avatars I’m starting to see…

Please put a stop to this madness! You too can prevent unnecessary, annoying glossy-lipped avatars.

Anonymity is important I guess — but come on! This is the worse thing since Simpson avatars.

Now half-face shots, doggies and shoes. Those are my favs. Leave those alone.

Will you be my pixilated wife?

On my morning drive today I heard on NPR’s Wait, Wait…Don’t Tell Me! that a man is having a virtual marriage with another woman as his real life wife stands by and fumes about it. Feel free to click the previous link, but below is an exerpt from the The Wall Street Journal.

He’s [Ric Hoogestraat of Phoenix] never met the woman outside of the computer world of Second Life, a well-chronicled digital fantasyland with more than eight million registered “residents” who get jobs, attend concerts and date other users. He’s never so much as spoken to her on the telephone. But their relationship has taken on curiously real dimensions. They own two dogs, pay a mortgage together and spend hours shopping at the mall and taking long motorcycle rides. This May, when Mr. Hoogestraat, 53, needed real-life surgery, the redhead cheered him up with a private island that cost her $120,000 in the virtual world’s currency, or about $480 in real-world dollars. Their bond is so strong that three months ago, Mr. Hoogestraat asked Janet Spielman, the 38-year-old Canadian woman who controls the redhead, to become his virtual wife. The woman he’s legally wed to is not amused. “It’s really devastating,” says Sue Hoogestraat, 58, an export agent for a shipping company, who has been married to Mr. Hoogestraat for seven months. “You try to talk to someone or bring them a drink, and they’ll be having sex with a cartoon.”

First of all, I died laughing. Really? A virtual marriage? If I were in a virtual world of sin and fantasy, I’m not sure if I would pick marriage as my place to romp. Although those virtual motorcycle rides the couple takes sounds fun. But why in the world of fantasy land would you want a mortage and a ball and chain — even if it isn’t exactly real? However that really isn’t the point.

In this brave new world of technological improvements on products from yesteryear and the Internet being arguably the lifeblood and pulse of recent existance, isn’t this kind of like cheating? Isn’t it really like trading up for a virtually “better” version of what you already have? Kind of like a software upgrade?

Mr. Hoogestraat’s real-life wife is losing patience with her husband’s second life. “It’s sad; it’s a waste of human life,” says Mrs. Hoogestraat, who is dark-haired and heavy-set with smooth, pale skin. “Everybody has their hobbies, but when it’s from six in the morning until two in the morning, that’s not a hobby, that’s your life.”

Time to leave Mrs. Hoogestratt, time to leave.