Archive for the ‘nudity’ Category

Stripper tax?

Short and sweet…

The state of Texas (my “lovely” home) will more than likely begin implementing a tax on strip club cover charges. Seeing how there usually isn’t a clamoring of support for “sin,” I’m doubting this new law won’t take affect despite the efforts of business owners. How much are we talking about you might ask? FIVE DOLLARS! That may not sound like a lot but that charge is ON TOP (pardon the pun) of what the clubs already charge.

Well, I obviously don’t frequent such places. (insert smug grin here) However, I’m not opposed to gentleman’s clubs even though I think the world can live without them. Mainly I just feel that in America everyone has the right to legal business. And strip joints fall under that category. Just don’t put one next to an elementary school.

I suspect that strip club owners would like to keep the cover charge somewhat low. That way the drinks will keep flowing. The tips keep spilling. The money that will come from the tax will supposedly go to help uninsured folks and sexual assault prevention programs. But yea. We’ll see.

Did someone say Britney with vag?

So I still don’t know what I’m going to dress as this year for Halloween, but my assistant said I should go as Britney Spears with a fake vagina stuck on the outside of my clothes. Not sure about that one, but starting late early morning I will be seeking out bits and pieces of what’s left of costumes at the local supercenter and get creative. Hence I will be neglecting this blog and the reading of others for the sake of weekend festivities. Unless something so crazy happens I can’t help but feed my up-to-the-minute blog addiction. If you are partaking in the revelry, be safe and take off the mask before you drop your pants in a strange place…

WTF?!

And I know that this LOL feed doesn’t match the title…I just like this cat’s reaction better!

Reaching a new low: Celebrity media must die

Period.

I’m all for certain magazines that don’t drip celebrity on every page but can be deemed almost as cheesy lethal (more than 100 pages and high gloss) that I won’t mention here for fear of being pigeon-holed into a Sex in the City cookie cutter category. Everyone has their guilty pleasures. OK. OK. I’ll admit to one. Marie Claire. I’ve lost any cool points I’m sure that I never really had at this blog I’m sure.

In this same vein, I am beginning to loathe just about every celebrity blog on the planet. It all just used to be kind of funny, mostly light-hearted and pretty much an escape from having to mentally check in everyday at work. I am not going to name every single one out there, but you know the key players. Even if you don’t read them, you know basically which ones everyone seems to keep coming back to. Except Best Week Ever. If you don’t like that blog/show, I don’t care. It keeps me in a rare good mood.

But knowing that there is Anna Nicole photo floating around on these sites, allegedly taken just after she passed, is just sick. Please. Before you label me one of those crazed celebrity fanatics, I’m sickened for humanity. It could have been anyone and I would have felt the same. OK, I will admit that I was watching Entertainment Tonight when I found out. But cut me some slack because it was my folks who had that show on when I was visiting.

ET was “discussing” this photo of Anna (really they just kept zooming in and out of it and showing it before EVERY commercial break) that was circulating the Web on many prominent celeb blogs. I won’t be plugging them here. I’m sure you have heard about this and if not, you are now Googling for it. But if you do, have the courtesy to open another window. For those of you curious but don’t want to look, I’ll just say she was sitting up in bed, looked like she was in mid vomit and topless. Even if the photo isn’t real, they are circulating it like it is and THAT is what sickens me. Gross. 

And if it is real, I know Anna was a mess. A big old, sometimes skinny old, crazy mess. However, no one deserves that. And we don’t need to see it at our 6 p.m. dinnertime either. Why the hell would ANYONE be interested in seeing such morbid shit? What kind of people are we? I’m not some kind of moral compass guru but the behavior of people (namely a coke-snorting-off-the-stomach-of-her-baby-while-breat-feeding hooker) is really starting to make me want to have a Michael Douglas moment. But not enough to have a Sean Penn moment.

And being that I’m in the media field, I want to see the death of celebrity bullshit reporting. It’s not reporting and is just as useful as cat fecal matter. Wait. Cat fecal matter can at least go in the garden and grow shit…

Again, even if that nasty photo wasn’t real, someone who thinks it is a wonderful (yet we all know profitable) idea to shoot a snapshot of a possibly dead, overdosed woman deserves a bed of pen of needles in hell while their fingernails get ripped off and they are forced to watch Jennifer Lopez movies over and over (but not Selena.)

Update: “Official”  folks are officially saying the pic is in fact not real.  Just the crazy bitch goofing off with chicken and tarter sauce. But can we please just let this train wreck rest already?And I still stand firm. Just think if it was … What am I saying? You would still Google it.

we don’t have to take our clothes off…

Remember that Jermaine Stewart song? If you don’t, feel free to enjoy the cheese below.

But that is a lie. I think I’ve probably had some good times with my clothes on but with people finding any way possible to get naked, this one-hit wonder is obviously inaccurate. I’m not going to write all about Vanessa. You can get your share of it from the last 24 or so hours of eager bloggers posting at WordPress. But I will say this: What bothered me most about the picture of that ex-Disney Diva (her halo has been tarnished no matter how many more Disney flicks she does) in all her “glory” wasn’t her boobies. It was that her drapes and bedroom set didn’t quite match when I think she tried for it to. And I actually mean her decor, not her privates. That and the fact that I think I noticed a Target lamp. And there is something metal and unidentifiable on her wall that I couldn’t quite make out. Isn’t she supposed to be rich? And couldn’t she find a better camera to snap her stuff with that produces perfect lighting, zoom and pixels? Maybe the little punks of High School Musical didn’t get paid as much as I thought…

Anyway, who gives a rats about nakedness? Why is America so damn uptight? Man, when Janet Jackson let loose her areola you would have thought the Anti-Christ had finally arrived. Doesn’t this nation pride itself on expression and freedom? I guess not.

To me the main reason for clothes is because no one wants to see my thighs in action. That and I think there is some really unknown story in the Bible that you just never hear from passionate fundamentalists that has something to do about gaining knowledge or something. Geez. I don’t care if I see someone nude. To me it’s like saying I can’t stand seeing myself in the mirror. We all have tits. Butts. Big and small bellies. Well in America, mostly big ones.

I’m willing to bet money I don’t really have (unless you want to visit my shop, tee hee) that every last one of you have taken a “naughty” pic of yourself for or with your significant other. The difference is, when you are a celebrity, you get the chance to share it for some Google juice, to escape being type-casted or to get a quick coke fix of publicity.

I don’t care. Why does America care? Am I not an American? Hum, how many times can I say America in this post? America…

Too good not to post…I love my LOL generator!

 


Update: This post is currently like 96 on Top Posts. However, it has disappeared from most of the tags I posted it in. To test something, I reposted it under another title  for a while and sure enough it was in all the tags I listed. Weird. WordPress messes with me sometimes. And I’m sure I’ve been replaced already by Wet for Went.