Archive for the ‘crosses’ Category

I need no more crosses to bear…

I’m not exactly a religious person though I do believe in a higher power, a creator and all of that. I waver on evolution. That obviously has a place in the grand scheme of things even though I know it’s not a popular belief system. Even with my issues with being raised Christian but leaning more toward agnosticism, I’ve always held on to the saying, “God gives us no cross we cannot bear” or some variation of that. I have always heard that saying from hardcore Christians throughout my life. My mother used to say something along those lines though I believe she had her own way of saying things.

That bit about bearing crosses, maybe  it’s true. However, I’ve had enough crosses from just this year alone. More than I care to recall, more than I care to see again…

I’m sick today, yet again. I just can’t seem to get on the path to good health no matter how hard I try. Which leads me to medical bills upon medical bills. And then there’s all the changes with work: the layoffs, firings, resignations, issues with managing, slowly losing grip once again to a social life and pretty much realizing I’m kind of alone in a way. I have wonderful parents but I can’t lean on them forever. I guess this reads as a pity party. But really I’m trying hard to grasp at the aforementioned saying, “God gives us no cross we cannot bear.”

Through it all, I guess I get to the next day and the next and the next — but at what cost? When do the crosses stop coming? Where do I put them all?