Archive for December, 2007

Day 90: I still have a month to go…

December 27, 2007OK. Yes I know this is not a complete full photo…again. I don’t have a full-length mirror in my home if you can believe that. And I always forget to tell people to take a full photo of me when I’m out or at work. But I will make sure to get “the” final shot done by someone. A full one. I do have one though, in pajamas. And let’s just say I would never share it here! I think that once I’m done with this on the last day of the countdown which is my birthday — January 27 — I will recruit a work friend to do it. The office already knows what I’m up to. And they know how to properly use my camera.

But one thing you should know about his photo. I’m notorious for turning my head to make my face look smaller. In this photo I am shooting dead one — no super-cool camera angles, shooting above or photo-shopping. This is me. And my new glasses. Well, and funky hair. On average I hate taking a photo dead on.

So far I’ve lost five pounds. My arms have a little more definition. My mother said my bum looked smaller. Trust me. She doesn’t give those observations lightly! And I can’t be sure but I think I’ve lost at least two inches. All I know is that all my jeans fit a tad more loose which I’m guesstimating it’s about two inches more room. I feel so dumb but I didn’t take my measurements prior to starting this. But over the holiday my mother did and notated where I’m at now so by the end of January we’ll have some kind of accurate gage.

Another thing that doesn’t quite set right with me yet is that it’s been nearly 100 days and this isn’t 10 pounds lost! But I guess that’s not bad considering I started this in the triple threat holiday season and I didn’t gain a pound during all the temptation. Got to pat my back for something I guess…

Time bandits and promises

time_bandits.jpgFor a while now my parents and I stopped doing the big old gift exchange during the holidays. My father has always said, “Christmas is for kids.” It also doesn’t hurt that they bought me a washer and dryer this year. At that rate my father usually says, “You have Christmas all year anyway.”
So instead we usually do the large dinner and I decorate my own apartment — filling it to the brim with Christmas lights and garland. This year I took my Christmas tree over to their house. And I bought them both two presents. My mother seemed pleased but looked at me disapprovingly — begging to know how much I spent. To that I just said,
“You guys have done so much for me. Just let me do this for you.”
I made dad open his early. I was too eager. So on Christmas Eve I saw his eyes light up to the DVD of Time Bandits I bought him. We watched that movie so much, I grew up saying, “The little one?” If you have seen the movie you know what I’m talking about. There are these six little people and well, nevermind. Just know we quote this movie on a semi-regular.
My parents have the movie on one of those huge laser disk things. Not the sleek ones you see today. But the ones that looked like enormous 8-tracks. You had to inject the disks into this contraption and pull down a little lever. My parents still have a bunch of classics in those crazy things (The Muppet Movie, Star Wars, Richard Pryer’s Raw) but the old player doesn’t work anymore, of course. I spent years in my late teens, early 20s looking for Time Bandits on video cassette and could never find it. And then there it was, among all the other DVDs at Borders. Duh.
On to mom. One of the things I got her was a new cookbook. I bought her Nigella Lawson because I was sure she already had all the others — The Barefoot Contessa, Paula Deen, Tyler Florence …But I was wrong. She didn’t have any of them! Just Rachael Ray who I HATE! Anyway, I offered to exchange it but she wouldn’t have it. She was happy to see a different Food Network star in her hands. Which if you know my mother, you would know that she will just read the book but not use it. She likes to sit and read cookbooks. Her arthritis and feet are so bad now and combined with her extra weight, it is hard for her to stand at long periods of time. In fact this was one year that Christmas dinner was a complete chore and she elected my father and me to help. We didn’t start eating until nearly 3 p.m.! But every year she insists on cooking. And every year she complains more and more.

So I said that I was going to cook next year — at my apartment. I hate cooking in someone else’s kitchen. I told her she has a whole year to train in order to be able to go up my stairs. In return I promised a wonderful meal in a lovely Christmas setting. Dad of course will bring his famous cabbage and greens. As for the turkey, that’s going to be cooked at a local restaurant that does that kind of thing. No need in me taking on EVERYTHING quite yet. A turkey? By myself? Hell no.

merry christmas…

or should i say happy holidays?

i’m agnostic but even i know the reason for the season…

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Stripper tax?

Short and sweet…

The state of Texas (my “lovely” home) will more than likely begin implementing a tax on strip club cover charges. Seeing how there usually isn’t a clamoring of support for “sin,” I’m doubting this new law won’t take affect despite the efforts of business owners. How much are we talking about you might ask? FIVE DOLLARS! That may not sound like a lot but that charge is ON TOP (pardon the pun) of what the clubs already charge.

Well, I obviously don’t frequent such places. (insert smug grin here) However, I’m not opposed to gentleman’s clubs even though I think the world can live without them. Mainly I just feel that in America everyone has the right to legal business. And strip joints fall under that category. Just don’t put one next to an elementary school.

I suspect that strip club owners would like to keep the cover charge somewhat low. That way the drinks will keep flowing. The tips keep spilling. The money that will come from the tax will supposedly go to help uninsured folks and sexual assault prevention programs. But yea. We’ll see.

When life is too short…

I woke up this morning to yet another dream about a person who is no longer in my life. I tend to have the most bizarre and telling dreams but I never know what to do with them. In this particular instance, each time this person appears in my dreams, she is filled with mind-numbing illness and doesn’t really speak to me. She just sends these subtle cues I still don’t understand.

In reality, we are no longer friends. My habit here of blogging ended our friendship. Thing is I’m just someone who thinks with emotions. Whether or not that is a good thing, it has always has been a fault/trait/whatever part of me  and for the most part, I don’t really mean to hurt a soul unless they have hurt me. In this case I hurt someone unwillingly, unknowingly and in fact stupidly innocent in a comment to someone else’s blog…

Fastforward to now and I can tell you I recently received an email at work (of all places) from a person to my knowledge she no longer wants to have a thing to do with. He tracked down my work email and I didn’t appreciate that. I also didn’t appreciate that it was to ask me about what had happened to her. Why she wasn’t responsive…

He stated that he had received an email from her husband to leave her alone and that she had been in the hospital. It troubled me. She is often not well. And I didn’t know she had become that ill. I let him know that no longer having the friendship was painful enough, but to actually email me and tell me she had been in the hospital was even more tough. I told him I don’t have his answers of course and it wasn’t even my place to tell him if I even had them. The nerve of this man. I told him to never contact me again. And I told him to do the same of her. To leave her alone. In peace.

No matter what hurtful words said and mostly written between us, I will never stop caring what happens to the friend I have lost even if I’ll never really know what is happening in her life. I can only hope she will be well.

I’ll never really understand. And it’s no longer for me to know.

To live a life without regret is brave. I could sit here like many people I’ve heard time and time again and say I don’t regret a thing. I’m not that brave. I know there are things in my life that I would change. But the key is to let it go if you can’t change them.

It’s strange how the holidays make us all so sentimental. I just keep thinking how short life is…

To Dan…

To me there is no better holiday song than Dan Fogelberg’s “Same Old Lang Syne.” It’s bittersweet. It’s familiar. It’s heartfelt. dan-fogelberg-1-sized.jpgAnd takes place on Christmas Eve.

Dan Fogelberg died yesterday at the age of 56 after battling prostate cancer. Sadly ironic that his death was around the holidays. And so young. I’m a fan of his other tunes as well, “Leader of the Band” of course, like I hope you are too, but I can’t think of one song I didn’t love. And his lyrics will always haunt even though he’s gone…
To me there is no better holiday song than Dan Fogelberg’s “Same Old Lange Syne.” It’s bittersweet. It’s familiar. It’s heartfelt. And takes place on Christmas Eve.

Dan Fogelberg died yesterday at the age of 56 after battling prostate cancer. Sadly ironic that his death was around the holidays. And so young. I’m a fan of his other tunes as well, “Leader of the Band” of course, like I hope you are too, but I can’t think of one song I didn’t love. And his lyrics will always haunt even though he’s gone…

“We drank a toast to innocence,
We drank a toast to now.
And tried to reach beyond the emptiness,
But neither one knew how.
We drank a toast to innocence,
We drank a toast to time.
Reliving in our eloquence,
Another ‘auld lang syne’……”

Did the devil spike my cookie?

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While scrummaging around in my closet yesterday getting ready for the company Christmas party, I found an old fortune from who knows how long ago. It reads:

Be mischievous and you will not be lonesome…

Is it wrong that I took this to mean when it comes to men? I think I’ve been mischievous before and I appear to still be single. Let me check…

Yep. Single.

Anyway as I’ve said before the holidays are not the times many people are keeping up with blogging so I don’t know if anyone is even reading this, but I just had to write about this fortune. Not only is the scripture odd, but it’s not your typical fortune.

Most fortunes, even the really good ones you get from Pei Wei, always say something like being good to get what you want or paying it back or some other kind of funky foretelling. But to be mischievous? That sounds like an evil fortune. Did the devil spike my cookie? I wonder if I did something mischievous when I originally opened that cookie…

Does this mean I need to be all about sex and whatnot? Or does this mean that I’ve just got to kick up the sexy? I don’t know that I need to take cues from a fortune, of course. Especially one found on my floor that was possibly from two years ago that probably fell out of my jewelry box. But the coincidence that I found it just before that party is a strange one.

And I don’t know if I was fueled by it or not but I was up to a bit of mischief last night. The fortune was right. But I am pretty sure I was not alone with a potential suitor. (If that is even what “not being lonesome” meant in this particular case of odd fortune.) More like a fairly amusing night of my laughing too loud, sneaking an ill-gotten tequila shot with a coworker by the pool, talking inappropriately at a late dinner with other coworker friends and their boyfriends, and then a drive home — alone.

I have saved that fortune though. For a later date.

The holidays are beginning to show…

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I haven’t been reading much.

You haven’t been reading much.

So click these for my most recent recaps.

I probably won’t be on here that much until after the holidays…

 

SO MERRY WHATEVER YOU CELEBRATE THIS TIME OF YEAR!

What does it mean to give your life to Christ?

 

me too, honey.

Anyone care to answer?

For me lately it means the government will make sure to dictate what kind of religion I need to worship if a guy like Mitt Romney is president. A shiver just went down my spine…

But really. Feel free to answer. I’ve never really ever completely understood.

And I was raised Church of Christ.

*Some clarification.

I know a  guy like Mitt is no threat because he will never win. And being a Mormon hurts him. However it’s what he said that the extreme right really grabbed on to when he said to have freedom is to have religion. And I feel that you have to BE free to have whatever religion you choose.

I quite disagree with melding church and state and there are signs everywhere (though somewhat small) that we could some day have that kind of nation — full blast. And the government should never tell me that it’s only THEIR way of God that I should worship. When I say “I” I mean every person in America. We all should be able to choose. Church and state is forced in small-town America all over the nation and that is what I fear can spread.

However my question is quite a selfish one.

I want to hear from people who didn’t raise me! 

So, what does this question mean to you?

 

 

Day 72: Wipe down your equipment

wipe-down-your-equipment.jpgI’ve started counting calories…reluctantly.

The working out has been steady but I’ve been under the delusion that I’ve been eating the right portions of everything. Wrong. Of course wrong! I’ve been counting calories for a little more than a week and have already lost enough inches for the owner of this cafe across the street from my job to ask, “Have you lost weight?”

I didn’t just jump on this calorie thing. I did it kicking and screaming until my mother bought and gave me several books to help me along. And some notebooks to keep track. I’m staying at no more than 2,000 calories and I’ve done quite well. It doesn’t even annoy me that much anymore and I’ve lost a few of my hard and fast cravings: burgers, pizza…Sonic slushes. Wait. Now that I’ve typed that I need to find the calorie count for one because a slush suddenly sounds good…

Anyway, my mother has noted my progress. She is concerned for me because I’ve been so concerned. Because of medication and a thyroid disorder, she has trouble with her weight. In fact she is very good at managing food intake and now I’m in training. I’m only a pound away from dropping under the dreaded weight I am now which, no matter how disclosing I am here, I will never share. At least not until I am well below it.

Because of overdoing the reception on Saturday and dancing all night, I haven’t hit the gym. I am only just now nearly 100 percent from having all that nausea. I don’t think a hangover lasts that long and I’m now convinced I got food poisoning from the all of six bites of Chinese food I had that night after the club. Or maybe it’s because I haven’t been doing that kind of food and my body went into shock. Don’t know.

The last time I went to the gym my favorite treadmill was covered in snot and spit. No lie! It was like someone was so determined to finish their miles that they didn’t care they had an upper-respiratory infection or other funky health issue in the process. It was so sick I almost didn’t work out. But instead I grabbed on to the very dry elliptical machine and tried not to heave. I don’t know why I shared that except to give warning to all of you who work out and like to grab onto those heart-rate bars like I do. Never again.