Archive for September 10th, 2007

A New America

Stumbling around old junk and filing things away tonight, I made a very ironic discovery. An old editorial I had written while in college about THE day. September 11. How eerie being that the very Tuesday is upon us.

Another irony: The editorial was attached with a rejection letter from the company I work for today. I don’t blame them for the rejection. However as I was retyping the letter for this blog, I felt all that terrifying emotion of 9/11 all over again. I will admit the tears from remembering that day came upon me. And in the end I had written what was/is still raw to me. Look pass the green around the gills nature of it and think back to what you were doing that day…

A New America

I should have known by the way it stayed wet and gray for a week before it happened.

The air seemed different somehow but it wasn’t just the constant rain that made breathing hard or the constant humidity. Humidity so thick the atmosphere hung like a noose over every passerby. The depression sunk in and I suddenly wondering why the rain bothered me so much. Texas is notorious for strange weather but it seemed to be something more — something felt wrong.

So that morning I peeled myself from the warmth of the covers. The sleep I attempted the night before was unsettled and sporadic. As I tried to shake off the exhaustion, my forehead crinkled a bit and I whimpered at the idea of starting my day. My thoughts were still wrestling in the waves of melancholy. First instinct: Turn on the radio. Second instinct: Make sure it’s loud. I had forgotten that I had left the stereo on an alternative station but my anxious dial turning fingers froze at the news my very non-favorite DJ delivered. He was speaking about something no American plans to hear at 9 a.m. For some reason the only words I understood followed this order: Pentagon. New York. Terrorists. All the other words blurred as I ran to the television.

To my rapidly gained realization, the pieces of my confusion were suddenly being glued together with images too shocking to compute. I called my father who I was extremely surprised did not call me first considering he is the master of current events. He did not know. It happened so quickly. School seemed unimportant somehow but I still needed to get to class. How could I not being that my father encouraged me to go? I got showered and got dressed to the news blaring in the den. I rushed to the car and every radio station I programmed was covering the tragedy, our tragedy.

Two planes ripped into the World Trade Center towers in New York; another destroyed a part of the Pentagon. More than thousands lost or dead. I called my mother as soon as I was on my way. She had just finished crying — one of the towers had collapsed due to the extreme impact of the plane. Mom cried. I can count on my hand how many times I have actually seen her weep.

There is no need to go into detail. We all know what happened. Every business has a lowered flag in front of their building as cars pass by with red, white and blue ribbons flying high on antennas. Every store is sold out of our nation’s flag as billboards of churches and restaurants proclaim God Bless America and United We Stand.

How will this affect the way people perceive life? In my generation, being a young person means our sense of direction is ornamented with responsibilities, the quest for complete education and the hopes of achieving every goal we set. I may not speak for the nation’s youth, but for me the path is now marred. The edges are rough with uncertainty, jagged with sorrow and covered in the debris of disbelief. What now? Business as usual is difficult. Everyday new coverage and constant red, white and blue reminders populate the city. We shouldn’t forget. We dare not. But where do you go from here when an already undetermined future becomes even more uncertain and laden with catastrophe?

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Now you are just having fun with me…

OK. OK. I get it. You can put some funky things together in a search engine post to get to my blog. And now that you see I will probably write about it, it’s even more of a thrill to see if I take it seriously. Can the owner of shoot all her clothes off, rednecks who date interracially and dating with women 60 plus please stand up.

I know you are just having fun with me now!